Are You Confident?

What we call confidence is often context, not character.

The mistake most people make is thinking of confidence as a single, global trait, something you either have or you don’t, and something that shows up the same way across all environments. I see confidence differently. I see it as a set of behaviors fueled by mindset, expressed differently depending on the context and the people involved.

Some people are quietly confident. There’s no showy behavior, no need for attention. They move to the beat of their own internal drummer. To others, they may come across as odd or brilliant. Their confidence isn’t loud, but it’s steady.

Then there’s the person who takes the stage. Spotlight, presence, charm. They’re easily recognized as confident and often admired for it. If asked, they’ll likely confirm: Yes, I’m confident. What often goes unsaid is that this confidence may be limited to a particular arena. They may be confident professionally yet feel wholly inadequate in their personal life. So are they confident, or confident within one system?

Then there’s confidence that’s effort-dependent. Take the woman who felt confident before having her first child. After childbirth, her confidence in her physical presentation fades until she has time to work out again. As she regains strength and familiarity with her body, the confidence returns. You see it in how she walks, in what she wears to the beach. That’s situational confidence, and again, not necessarily reflected across every area of her life.

So when we ask whether someone is confident, what are we really asking? What evidence are we using to support that claim?

We tend to equate confidence with eye contact, upright posture, and fluent, articulate speech. But we’re not privy to internal dynamics. We don’t see mindset. People can perform confidence convincingly while quietly wrestling with deep imposter syndrome.

Confidence, then, isn’t a universal badge. It’s contextual. And often, it’s misunderstood.

So perhaps the better question isn’t “Are you confident?”
But “What is your confidence rooted in?”

Confidence built on performance, approval, appearance, or circumstance will always fluctuate. Bodies change. Roles shift. Seasons end. Applause fades. But Scripture reminds us that our steadiness was never meant to come from within ourselves alone.

“Such confidence we have through Christ before God. Not that we are competent in ourselves to claim anything for ourselves, but our competence comes from God.”
— 2 Corinthians 3:4-5

Biblical confidence is not self-manufactured bravado. It’s a settled assurance that comes from knowing who you belong to and where your strength originates. It allows for quiet confidence and bold confidence, for seasons of visibility and seasons of obscurity—without requiring you to perform for your worth.

When confidence is rooted in Christ, it doesn’t need to look the same in every room. It only needs to be faithful in the one you’re standing in.

If this resonates, it may be time to stop asking whether you’re confident and start discerning where your confidence is being asked to grow.

Coaching isn’t about fixing what’s broken. It’s about strengthening what’s already there, aligning your mindset, faith, and daily practices so you can show up with clarity and steadiness in every season.

If you’re ready to cultivate confidence that isn’t dependent on performance, appearance, or applause, I’d love to walk alongside you.
Reach out to connect or learn more about my coaching services.

Because confidence grounded in truth—and guided with intention—changes everything.